Saturday, August 7, 2010

mid-20s crisis

This year is my high-school 10 year reunion, which means I'm old enough to be invited to a 10 year reunion. My facebook has subsequently been inundated with friend requests from my class of 2000 and its super exciting to see what they are all up to. (except now I think facebook has destroyed the concept of the 10 year reunion, we already know who's married, who's fat, who's successful)

Most of the time, I can convince myself I'm happy where I am in life. I decided not to follow the career path led to me by my initial degree, and am now back to full-time study and working in a pub. And it feels good, knowing I'm young and can keep deciding what my dream is, and it doesn't matter how much time it wastes.

But every now and again, I see someone has had another baby, or gorgeous wedding photos, or some amazing job overseas, and I wonder if I've made the right choice.

Why are decisions always perfect on their own, but qualified against others we question them?

One girl in my old class is married with five kids. Five! I think I'm grown up for adopting a dog. Is 30 really the new 20? Or am I deluding myself I can keep on wasting time and get a 'real' job later?

But its okay, really. I know I'm happy, thats the main thing. I love James, I love Shaun, my job, my school. And if I'd taken the 'real' job in the first place I'd never have gotten to find out what I really love, or who I really am.

Besides, if I was in Hollywood, I'd be 40 before I'd be expected to get married and have kids.

Maybe I'll move to LA. Or New York. That sounds grown up.

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